Supporting LGBTQ+ Youth
By Dr. Tiffany Somerville
Let’s take a moment to reflect on Pride Month, which is a time to celebrate LGBTQ+ (lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, questioning/queer) individuals and their fight for equal rights.
Pride Month takes place in June to commemorate the history of protests against anti-LGBTQ+ violence and discrimination, particularly the Stonewall Riots which occurred in June 1969 in New York City. Though the Stonewall Riots took place over 50 years ago, LGBTQ+ individuals are still fighting to be free from homophobia, transphobia, discrimination, and violence. As being LGBTQ+ has become generally more accepted in American society, more and more children and teenagers have been coming out, meaning there are now more openly LGBTQ+ youth than ever before. However, LGBTQ+ youth are at an increased risk for mental health issues, and nearly half (45%) of LGBTQ youth reported that they seriously considered attempting suicide in the past year. If you are a caregiver of an LGBTQ+ youth, your support is essential for maintaining your child’s emotional well-being and reducing their risk of suicide. This article will cover important terms from the LGBTQ+ community, information on stressors for LGBTQ+ youth, how caregivers can provide support, and where caregivers can find important information on LGBTQ+ issues.
LGBTQ+ is an “umbrella” term for a wide variety of different identities, including sexual orientations and gender identities. Terminology is always changing and evolving, and each individual person may have a different definition of what a term means for them. You should always ask your child what a specific term, such as “transgender” or “bisexual,” means to them, but it is also helpful to have some general knowledge of what different LGBTQ+ identity terms usually refer to.
This brief list covers some important terms for LGBTQ+ youth:
Sex (or “biological sex”) – a person’s biological classification (usually male or female) based on their reproductive organs and their genetic makeup
Gender identity – how you feel inside and how you express yourself. Could be male, female, a combination of the two, or neither. Gender is complex, and it may or may not match with a person’s biological sex.
Transgender – a term for a person whose gender identity does not match their sex, e.g. someone whose biological sex is male, but their gender is female
Cisgender – a person whose gender identity matches their biological sex
Gender dysphoria – significant distress caused when a person’s sex differs from their gender or when they are not able to express their true gender identity
Nonbinary – a person who does not identify as exclusively male or female. They often use the pronouns “they/them” instead of using gendered pronouns
Sexual orientation – who a person is sexually and/or romantically attracted to
Bisexual – a person who is sexually and/or romantically attracted to male and female individuals
Lesbian – a woman is sexually and/or romantically attracted to other women
Gay – a person who is sexually and/or romantically attracted to a person of their same gender. This term is often used to describe a person of any gender.
→ Additional definitions can be found on Glaad.org for a broader range of LGBTQ+ and transgender terms.
Although LGBTQ+ identities have become more culturally accepted over time, LGBTQ+ youth continue to experience homophobia, transphobia, and a lack of family and community support, all of which threaten their emotional well-being. In 2022, the Trevor Project conducted a survey of 34,000 LGBTQ+ youth ages 13 to 24, and the results indicated that 45% of LGBTQ+ youth seriously considered suicide and 14% attempted suicide within the last year. Transgender youth are especially at risk – nearly 1 in 5 transgender youth reported attempting suicide. LGBTQ+ youth are also at risk of harm and discrimination from others – 36% reported being physically threatened or harmed and 73% reported that they experienced discrimination because of their gender identity and/or sexual orientation. Additionally, 73% of LGBTQ+ youth reporting having symptoms of anxiety, and 58% reported having symptoms of depression. LGBTQ+ youth reported feeling afraid to talk about their mental health concerns with their caregivers, and 60% wanted mental health treatment but did not receive care. Being LGBTQ+ doesn’t inherently “cause” mental health issues or lead to suicide; homophobia, transphobia, discrimination, and lack of support from family and community create the painful distress that can lead LGBTQ+ youth to experience mental illness and to attempt suicide.
Find Additional Local LGBTQ+ Resources at the Bottom of This Post ↓
It is clear that LGBTQ+ youth are experiencing a mental health and suicide crisis. Fortunately, we also have research that shows us what helps to reduce the risk of suicide and improve the emotional well-being of LGBTQ+ youth. LGBTQ+ young adults who reported that they felt rejected from their families when they were teenagers were 8.4 times more likely to have attempted suicide and 3.4 times more likely to use drugs when compared to LGBTQ+ peers with higher family acceptance. LGBTQ+ youth who feel accepted by at least one caregiver are significantly less likely to experience depression, suicidal ideation and behavior, and substance use; they also have higher self-esteem and overall emotional health. For transgender youth, receiving gender affirming care significantly reduces the risk of suicide and mental health issues like depression. Having a supportive school and community environment also helps to reduce suicide risk for LGBTQ+ youth. Additionally, 89% of LGBTQ+ youth reported that watching TV shows and movies with LGBTQ+ characters made them feel more positively about their identity. As a caregiver of an LGBTQ+ child, you can provide crucial, life-saving support.
The Trevor Project’s research identified several strategies that caregivers can utilize to show their support for their LGBTQ+ child:
Welcoming LGBTQ+ friends or partners
Talking with them respectfully about their identity
Using their name and pronouns correctly
Supporting their gender expression
Educating yourself about LGBTQ+ people and issues
Watching media (e.g. TV shows and movies) with LGBTQ+ characters
As a caregiver, you may be wondering where you can find additional information on issues facing LGBTQ+ youth and how you can provide appropriate support. Reputable sources for information include the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), the Trevor Project, the Human Rights Campaign, and PFLAG. For more specific information on supporting a transgender child, check out HealthyChildren.org which has recommendations from the American Academy of Pediatrics. Be cautious about finding information online as there is significant heated political discussion in the US regarding LGBTQ+ youth, and many sources provide inaccurate information that could be harmful to your child. Look for information from reputable sources such as government agencies, medical and mental health professionals, and large LGBTQ-affirming organizations (e.g. the Trevor Project).
Finally, here are some overall recommendations for supporting the emotional well-being of your LGBTQ+ child:
Be affirming and supportive. Remember that your support as a caregiver is crucial to your child’s emotional well-being and for reducing their risk of suicide. Having support from just one caregiver can significantly reduce an LGBTQ+ child’s risk of suicide.
If you don’t know, ask (kindly). If you don’t understand something about your child’s expressed identity, ask them to explain it to you. Try to express your acceptance and genuine curiosity when you ask a question. It’s okay not to know everything, and your child will likely be happy to educate you about something so important to them!
Pay attention to the news. There is a lot of political discussion happening right now related to LGBTQ+ youth, particularly transgender youth. Keep an eye on laws that are passed both locally and nationwide. If you can, find ways to advocate for laws that support your child’s mental health, which could include access to gender-affirming care.
Do something fun for Pride! There are countless activities, events, and parades happening in our area during the month of June. If you’re comfortable doing so, consider going to a fun Pride event with your child to show your support.
Talk with their therapist. As therapists, we work hard to stay educated and informed about all aspects of our clients’ lives, which includes their identities. We are happy to provide resources, answer questions, and help you to support your child!
Additional LGBTQ+ Resources:
Pflag is the first and largest organization dedicated to supporting, educating, and advocating for LGBTQ+ people and their families, with locations in Edwardsville and St. Louis.
Equality Illinois is the state's oldest, largest and most effective advocacy organization dedicated to defending rights for LGBTQ+ Illinoisans.
PROMO is Missouri's statewide organization advocating for LGBTQ equality in the Show-Me State.
MetroEastPride encourages unity, celebrates diversity, promotes equality and advocates for inclusion of all persons on the LGBTQIA spectrum.
St. Louis Queer Support Hotline (SQSH), offers free, confidential, and identity-affirming emotional support and resource referrals by and for the greater St. Louis LGBTQIA+ community.
